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Friday, August 29, 2008

Letter to Ukraine (and more)

Please begin the letter with a culturally appropriate greeting for me!

This is Hope, Roma's host mother in the United States. I am very concerned about Roma right now. He is unhappy and wants to return home as soon as possible. He has concerns that he is going to lose a year of education and not be prepared for the national exams for entrance to university because of the differences in our educational systems. He does not seem "homesick" as I have spoken with his teachers and they report that he has made friends and is sociable in school. The teachers also report that he does not turn in his assigned homework, however, which is often an important part of grades received here.

Roma and my son Michael and I spoke at length about these issues on Wednesday evening. He has also spoken with our local Coordinator for the exchange program. I have to admit I have not spoken to her fully about the outcome of their conversation because of our time constraints due to working. She did tell me to expect a phone call soon from someone higher up in the Exchange Program administration so I suspect that Roma expressed to her that he still wants to return home quickly.

When we spoke on Wednesday I asked Roma if I could get him to commit to stay until the end of September. I feel that in that amount of time we can look for some solutions to the educational differences. Bloomington is a diverse international and educated community. I feel that if we had that month we may be able to find resources through the school system or the university to address his needs. I am sure we can even find someone who has taken the Ukrainian exams or at least another Eastern European country's exams who can help him know what he needs to do to be prepared and help us find resources. For example, the people translating this and sending it on to you in my behalf! I also have a friend from Belarus who has a master's degree in linguistics and literature and has worked as a teacher and a university lecturer in her home country. I am sure I could count on her help either as a teacher or in finding other resources. I haven't been able to speak to her about it yet, because she is in Belarus right now.

I am writing to explain the situation but also to ask you if you will support me in asking Roma to try it a little longer. I don't know how much he has communicated with you. If he has already explained the situation and you support him returning home quickly please let me know. Please respond to Professor Trotter and he will translate and let me know your feelings.

Roma is a good boy with varied interests and a great sense of humor when he is happy. I hope that we can have him a little longer and get to know him better and that he can be happier here with us. Thank you for your will to share him for such a long period of time and I hope we can work it out.

Respectfully,

Hope

So we will see what happens. The man who is translating for me is a Director and Outreach coordinator of Eastern European studies at IU. His wife is native Russian. They live in Gillian's neighborhood so she hooked me up with them when I found out Yelena is in Belarus for over two more weeks. I just want the whole mess settled and over with. You know I like my life boring and this is all way too dramatic and complicated for me!

I went for my post-op visit with Dr. Weiler today. I can't remember if she said THE most difficult or one of the most difficult tubals she has ever done. Apparently I have TON of scar tissue and adhesions from my prior sugery. She said if I ever have to have any other surgery I have to inform the surgeon that I have multiple adhesions and that I can probably not do any more surgeries at the surgery center, but should always be at the hospital. She asked how my recovery was so I said, well.... I didn't go for a hike until Sunday and I didn't mow the lawn until this week. Before I even finished saying them she said, "You overdid it." She's been my dr. for ten years and knows my hyper, must-feel-productive-all-the-time problem. So she checked the incision that had bruised so badly after the hike and the one that is still scabby and said they are okay because they are not infected.

Dr. Weiler also favors me having the lap-band surgery, just like Dr. Andry does so we talked about that a little too. I would rather just lose the weight with fantastic self discipline and control. Even then I will STILL have to have another surgery. Because all my fat is in my belly I will be one of those people who will have to get the extra skin removed and stuff when the weight is gone. The idea of that scares me so badly. I need to not think about it because the fear might make me sabotage the process. I am good at self-sabotage! I want to be healthier, though, and not have to take so much medicine and weight loss is the key to all that!

Happy today for staying late at work... yes I know it sounds crazy, but I am crazier not being ready for the end of the month. I will probably go in for a little while tomorrow too!

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