Sunday, July 4, 2010


I think I have already done my celebrating. Michael and I were supposed to go to Bedford (Garet's town) to see fireworks and Michael hasn't returned home from wherever he is. I don't think I want to go alone. Garet will be shooting the event and won't really be able to spend time with me.

I may just call Garet, leave Michael a note and go to the car wash to vacuum the car. I hate how dirty it is! If either one of them really want me he can call and summon me!

I'm in a grumpy mood. Dealing with Mom and Dad on Friday was frustrating, to put it mildly.

I spent time with Garet last night and began to feel like it is another relationship where I am expected to put somebody else's needs above my own all the time. I may have simply been too tired for it to be a good night no matter what had happened, but I am still a little bitter today. I have already made moves toward relationship sabotage, which is very dangerous. I have some real decisions to make about the future. I'm sick with myself about it.

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