Wednesday, September 15, 2010


Saw "Hopeless Crush" again today. I attended a funeral at church. The deceased was the grandfather of the woman I would like Hopeless Crush to fall in love with. When Hopeless Crush and I talked all the time he told me she loved him and had told him so. H.C., however is very frightened of relationships. I hate to say it, but part of it is fucked up Mormonthink. He is afraid if he gets married to somebody in the temple, they are sealed to his son, and then gets divorced or something that something eternally awful will happen to his "claim" on his son. ANY God I could believe in would not let this happen, PLUS it seems insane to me that Jim doesn't recognize in the patriarchal society of the Mormon church HE would have all first claim on the child or any other children they would have. It's such a shame because J. is a beautiful, talented and amazing woman. I have known her since her early teen years and always loved her. Jim should be honored that she loves him and should jump at the chance. Alas, his own family of origin has a history of dysfunction and I am certain that is combining with the Mormonthink to prevent him from having a healthy relationship. So sad for both of them, and for sweet little boy, who could have one of the best moms on earth. I still enjoyed watching Jim during the funeral. I am not above getting my jollies in the midst of grief.

The deceased was one of the kindest, most giving men I have ever known. It was an honor to have had him and his family in parts of my life.

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