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Wednesday, August 13, 2008

One big thing accomplished

Roma is registered for classes and at school. It took two trips to get it done because we didn't take his passport along first time and they needed it for proof of his birth date. Also the exchange program hadn't sent all the immunization records so they had to fax them over before the school would finalize his enrollment.

I felt nervous leaving him there, like a mom with a kindergartner. Funny thing is, I am very hands-off with my own children. I make them do all their own school stuff; forms, registration, scheduling and the like, and just sign whatever I need to sign to finalize it (and seem to write a lot of checks). I felt more protective of him, I guess because he just arrived and even though his English is really good, I worry.

I still feel so stressed about the rest of the day and leading up to surgery tomorrow. Will had to go out of town for a funeral today. He is supposed to call me when he gets back tonight. I hope it is not too late because I made him promise to just tell me all kinds of positive things about how easy surgery will be and how strong I am and other nice things to calm me down. I am so frightened of anesthesia and needles and being incapable of caring for myself. I know this is outpatient surgery and supposed to be a quick recovery, but there are so many extra things happening at the same time I believe my fears are exacerbated. I think today I will probably have to take the tranquilizers that I have been counseled to use as needed, even though I hate them. I have an ache in my gut just thinking about what will be happening in the next twenty-four hours, and also feel like my breathing is so shallow I am not getting enough air.

So I guess today I should be happy for Ativan, even though I hate taking it.

3 comments:

Deb said...

I've been thinking of you, today; I'll be thinking of you tomorrow. Take good care of yourself while it's needed and let others take care of themselves until you're up to it. Ya heard it from Mutha Too!

P.S. Could be blowing smoke, but I think Ativan really is more an anti-anxiety agent than a tranquilizer.

Hope said...

Yes, anti-anxiety is correct. That is why I have it. I swear it doesn't seem to really help much, but maybe I would be even worse without it. The whole not remembering to breathe thing is a bad thing.

Anonymous said...

My name is Craig Hannah and i would like to show you my personal experience with Ativan.

I have taken for 6 years. I am 37 years old. GREAT FOR INSOMNIA......Great for Manic stages of Bi-Polar..It's really is the only drug I can take without any side effects..I cannot even take asprin without feeling it..I have OCD and have severe sensitivity to meds, this one is great.

Side Effects :
None.....Miracle drug...onset of 20/30 minutes, peak of 1 to 3 hrs...it will erase your memory if u take it in large doses...made that mistake once..Been on and off of it since 2001. I don't get addictive to it. I only take .05 2 x a day for controlling High Blood Pressure, Anxiety and IBS..I sometimes can get away with breaking the 0.5mg down into 4 equal doses.

I hope this information will be useful to others,
Craig Hannah